Tips for a Destination Wedding
Planning a wedding is fun, hard, exciting, stressful, and all of the feels. Hot take- planning a wedding should be about what the couple wants, and no one else. I know you think you owe it to your parents and friends and family and your third aunt twice removed, but you don’t. Two people’s wedding is about that: two people and exactly what you want. When you look back 10 years from now (if you are still married, lmao) make sure this day and event is still a great moment and memory for you and your partner and not stressful. If I could give any advice, that is what I would say: do what the two of you want and fuck the rest of the noise <3
Matt and I had the idea of a destination wedding after we looked at venues in New York City AND in the state of Georgia. It was expensive as fuck for both states, believe it or not. The cheapest venue and dinner in NYC we found was $40k for about 60 people. The nicest venue and dinner in Georgia that was not in a barn (which is awesome if you have your wedding in a barn, just not Matt and I’s speed) was honestly close to $40k but for 150 people-ish. We weighed the pros and cons for both and Matt jokingly said one night “for that price, we could do a nice af trip to Europe.” So with the idea and possibility planted in my head, I started googling and doing research on micro weddings in Europe (micro weddings are weddings with less than 50 guests).
Matt and I had been to Italy in May 2022 visiting Rome, Florence and Venice. We had a magical time and fell in love with Rome. It was such a romantic trip with the best food we had ever had and one of our favorite trips we have ever taken together. So that is why we picked Rome, simply because we loved it and had visited before. Are we Italian? No. Do we have Italian heritage? No. Do we speak Italian? No. Then how did you plan a wedding there? I am about to tell you!
The first thing, the most important thing and the only thing you need to do a destination wedding is a wedding planner. You simply cannot do it without one. If you do not live in that country, speak the language, know how their business and culture works, there is no way on the planet you can do it yourself. I don’t care if you move there and try, you can’t. Our wedding planners were a gift from God and we could not have asked for better women to create this special day for us. They handled absolutely everything and more than I could ever think of!
After we had the idea of destination wedding, I started googling “destination wedding planners in Rome” and submitted a lot of forms that ask you things like “how did you and your partner meet? Why do you want to get married here? What is your budget? How many guests will you have?” Etc. The wedding planners we ended up hiring responded the fastest, nicest and set up a call with us immediately. After discussing pricing and our vision with them, it was a no brainer. Our micro wedding in Rome and our two week honeymoon in Europe after was less than any wedding venue or pricing we saw in the US.
After hiring our wedding planners, we planned a week trip to Rome in March 2023 to meet our wedding planners and look at wedding venues in person. It was SOOO much fucking fun. There was a bunch of free stuff involved (because everyone wants you to pick their venue obviously): wine, lunch, olive oil, bags, desserts, etc. And like I mentioned before, our wedding planners knew every single person who lived and worked in Rome. It made our lives significantly easier.
We picked the wedding venue and date that trip. After that, planning was easy because our wedding planners sent us options for all of the details for the wedding via email and WhatsApp and we just said yay or nay if we liked the options. Because they have been wedding planners in Rome for so long, they were super close with all of the vendors. Our wedding planners did the following: venue options and booking and handling, DJ & music, created unique ceremony tailored to Matt and I, handled lunch day of wedding, dinner at wedding, all happy hours and cake, stationary & gifts, flowers, lights and in-person all wedding day. Matt and I did the following: create & send out the save the dates and official invites, make our wedding website, found a hotel close to the venue and worked with them for a block of rooms, hired our own photographer & videographer, did my own hair & makeup, plan and book the wedding week festivities and welcome party (which a lot of wedding planners can and will do all of these, we just wanted to do all of this on our own).
Wedding Planning Timeline:
Engaged: October 2022
Research destination wedding planners: November 2022
Hired destination wedding planners: January 2023
Visited Rome to meet wedding planners & look at wedding venues in-person: March 2023
Venue selected: March 2023
Save the dates sent: July 2023
Official wedding invites & details sent: October 2023
Wedding & wedding week festivities: March 2024
Like I said before, I STRONGLY believe a wedding is about the two people getting married and what they want. Elope? Amazing. Wedding with 300 people? Perfect. Wedding on horses? Cute. Wedding in jail? Beautiful. Everyone has different budgets, family situations, visions and dreams for a wedding. It is one of the most important days of your life so make sure planning it is fun. I am just hear to tell you if you dream of a destination wedding, it is 100% doable.
Congratulations & cheers!
